10 Lessons from the Kitchen (as I write this I'm browning meat for tacos)

Throughout my years of cooking, which really started in college, I've taken a lot from other people. There's the obvious recipes from Mom that I make continually, the tacos and chili and chocolate chip cookies that are standards and get requests from most people who dine at my table. My dad is a solid go-to guy when it comes to recommendations for fancier meals and details. But I also learned a trick here and there from friends. I distinctly remember standing in my kitchen in Manhattan, Kansas with Matt, making dinner. He spent some time working in the kitchen of a bar-b-que restaurant and showed me how to bend my knuckles toward the blade of a knife so as to not cut off my fingertips. By watching my friend Leah make breakfast one morning I learned the speediest way to chop onions and the like is to keep the
point of the knife on the cutting board. My sister Rachel just recently gave me instructions for hard boiled eggs that are easy to peel. Boil for 16 minutes and then soak them in ice water. It worked and now making stuffed eggs isn't painful.

These are all things I probably could have learned from watching a cooking show or reading a food magazine. Since we don't have cable and my subscriptions are limited to Patagonia catalogs and coffee association magazines, I have to get my food knowledge from the people who surround me. My father-in-law, a man who is helpful in the kitchen if not really a cook himself, taught me one of the best tips for cooking and living. When he buys grapes he takes off all of the stems and rinses the grapes and puts them in a container. They are always ready to be eaten just as soon as you open the refrigerator. This is probably something he did when the kids were little and he wanted to make sure they could get a snack themselves. But this little trick spills over into all aspects of life, especially as a wife, mother and hostess.

2. Take whatever time I have now to prepare for what's coming up next.

If I pack up my bag with diapers, wipes, snacks and kleenex before the kids get up and we have to rush out of the door, the kids will be happier and I will be less stressed. That's the day-in and day-out example. As it applies to life in general, or for life without the time constraints of children, it means getting a calendar and keeping track of dates. Or contacting people in advance of needing something accomplished. My sister-in-law sent me an e-mail just the other day about a family event happening in May and the plans and gifts that needed to be taken care of because of this get together. Now I don't have to run around in a panic because something that should have been taken care of weeks ago won't get finished.

I suppose I realized this tip as I was plucking grapes myself and thinking about Passover. I sent out an email in February about the holiday and began making preparations for it at that time. But the discussions on the actual gathering of people didn't happen until two weeks before the first night of Passover and the stress quickly grew. Who would bring the sides? Who is eating at our home? What time is the seder starting? All of these details began to bog down the excitement of the event until all at once the pieces came together. As I set my table the afternoon before the celebration I realized if I could take care of all the details myself things would get done faster. The reality is, however, that I need other people to participate too. Which leads to...

3. It's okay to ask for help.

An envelope came in the mail about six months ago containing a handwritten note and an article from a magazine. It was an assignment, a writing assignment, something I haven't had in over 6 years: Come up with ten things I’ve learned from being a cook, or cooker, as Wyatt would call me (a good cooker, to be exact). Here’s the first installment of what I’m calling:

10 Lessons from the Kitchen

1. Enjoy the simple things
Tom likes to tell the story about coming home from work one day to find his small son playing with the cheese grater. I'm convinced he finds this funnier than everyone else does, but the truth is, I love my kitchen and all the things I get to play with while I cook. I used to keep the metal, tent-like cheese grater in the bottom pull-out cupboard. At the time this was right at Wyatt's eye level and he would open the doors and pull out the pots and pans and lids. And the grater. Looking back on it, I realize this was not the safest thing in the kitchen for him to play with. It also wasn't the most dangerous. And he never got hurt walking around with it. In fact, I've gotten more hurt grating parmesan cheese with it than Wyatt ever did carrying it around. The cheese grater is actually one of my prized tools in the kitchen. I tend to overdo it on the cheese because, honestly, cheese makes everything better.

Just like the grater, and the cheese that goes into meals, it’s sometimes the uncomplicated things in life that are easiest to enjoy. The kids love playing in the bathtub with old plastic bottles and bubbles. A plain bagel with cream cheese brings me so much satisfaction I could eat one every day. Saying “I love you” to Tom at random times makes him stop and smile so big you’d think I gave him $100.

When I go to Target or some large store that seems to have everything under the sun, I can wander the aisles all day, or at least as long as the kids will let me. Ooh, a bread machine. Cute dresses for spring. And look at all that food. When we get to the toy section the kids get goo-goo eyes and dream about how great their lives would be if only they could have these things. “Maybe I can get that” Wyatt says over and over. And “Baby!” Cassie cries as we go down the pink aisle. I refrain from buying these things for several reasons, but I’m reminded of the most important one when I get home. They love their toys, things they play with every day and things they’ve forgotten they even have. With the sun shining even more these days they spend hours outside, playing in the dirt, riding bikes, shoveling sand around with their buckets and scoops. They forget the toy aisle and all its grandeur and I head to the kitchen and pull out my cheese grater to start dinner.