sarah and i took the kids to the swimming pool yesterday and then got to hang out once the kiddos were asleep. we talked about album design and then she gave me these photos from my birthday. talk about cuties. we had fun. well, we had fun most of the time. sorry, rachel. here are some happier moments for the little guy.

this is so hilarious. my mom is part of a group of ladies called the pink flamingos. they get together and do old lady things. and they dress like wild women. they collect all the pink flamingo stuff they can find (see, bri, flamingos aren't too scary, right?) abbie is really kind to feed these birds that live at my mom's house.

that's a lot of candles. recently i've found that i've forgotten how old i am. all i have to do is remember it was my "golden" birthday. what a special one that is.

on a sidenote: anybody recognize this face? it must run in the family. you're right, DeAnn.

bread

go to allrecipes.com and print out 'jo's rosemary bread.' i know, it's for breadmachines, but don't worry. i don't have one and i made it. delicious.
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Jos-Rosemary-Bread/Detail.aspx

here's what i did:
the water, olive oil, sugar, and salt are according to the instructions. (1 cup water, 3T olive oil, 1 1/2 t sugar, 1 1/2 t salt).

then i added 1/4 teaspoon of oregano, 1/4 teaspoon of basil, 1 teaspoon of rosemary, 1/4 teaspoon of sage. 1 package of active dry yeast and 2 1/2 cups of flour. i mixed it all together, leaving the flour for last. once it's formed a ball, knead the bread for 10 minutes. add flour if you need to, but not too much. it will probably still be a bit sticky. drizzle olive oil on bowl, transfer dough make sure the dough gets covered lightly with olive oil. then place a cloth over the top.

jessica's tip for rising in a warm place is to pull out one of the racks of your oven, i use the middle one, and then turn the oven to the lowest temperature. this provides heat but doesn't bake it. make sure you put it in an oven safe bowl, however. the rack does get hot. l

et the bread rise for about 30 minutes in a warm place. punch it down, roll it out to about a 12" loaf, place on baking sheet, cover with light cloth (i used a paper towel. fancy, eh?) and place on oven rack for warmth to rise again. let it rise for about an hour. bake at 400' for approximately 15 minutes.

obviously everyone's oven is different, so adjust it accordingly. i used this for sandwiches and it was wonderful. really soft and flavorful. i've been looking for a bread like this, was frstutrated that it had bread machine directions ("place ingredients in the pan of the bread machine and select white bread cycle", helpful, huh?), but thanful that i've made bread enough to know a process for it. SERIOUSLY: i strongly suggest this bread. you should have no trouble. i'll be making it again this week and might have some photos.

i know this seems over the top. i'm having one of those days where i think my children are AMAZING. simply put, they are cute. cass is becoming a sleeping queen and wyatt is talking more and more. so here they are, in just a moment of funnyness, interacting. she watches him like a hawk and he thinks it's fun to treat her like a baby. i guess that's fair. some heads up, i think wyatt's been working on these numbers all morning and he thinks they're pretty good. cass looks a little disappointed, much like donald trump when he says "yah fiyad." that's some awesome hair she has coming in, huh? i guess when you're little it's alright to judo chop someone when the deal goes sour. again, i realize no one else may think this is funny, but i get a kick out of just about everything my kids do. that's normal, isn't it?

thanks to the new readers 'fessing up, susan and cassie. it's always good to know people are reading because sometimes...you wonder if your friend ryan has set up a fake account that's really just a word document so no one can read what you think is noteworthy. hats off to you girls.

there's more than a few things going on, and right now i'm feeling a little "procrastinatey". so, good shabbat as they say in "fiddler" or "shabbat shalom" as we usually sing.

for those of you who don't know, i have a more than talented sister named sarah (rachel is talented as well, more in the teaching kids how to do amazing things realm) and she has enlisted me to help her design a wedding album. i hesitate to do these kinds of things for her and kelly because i fear that when i give it to them they'll just redo the whole thing. so i have four pages done, at least, with some semblence of what they should look like, and i'm getting ready to send them off for approval. it's a rough job, telling myself she wants me to do this because she thinks i have an okay eye, but not really trusting myself enough to think it looks good. we'll see what she has to say. i'm just hoping to save her a little time in her over-scheduled life. she is superwoman, what arthur burke would call a ruler. she does it well.

also, i have several chapters and verses that i need to look up and refresh myself with, for personal and communal reasons, and i'm putting that off. i know it will get deep once i get into it, and so i'm hesitant. i'm looking forward to what God has to reveal, but it's 9:40 and i'm pretty sure i could go to sleep, except tom's not home and i'd rather just turn my head off altogether.

so, i'm blogging. and i'll tell you something that is oh so fun: wyatt has these red high top chuck taylors that he loves, right? the other morning, as i got him out of bed he pointed to the dresser and said "red shoes." of course it all slurs together, but it was definitely "red shoes." he talks a ton, for those that don't know (check out youtube and the previous post) but he's becoming more clear on everything. cottage cheese. fire truck. oh, these are the words that make me smile. he's mastered the stairs and climbs them like he's preparing for a soccer match. and cassie make me smile every day. recently it's been because of her cuddling with this floppy horse her auntie susan got her. we're pushing for it to be her favorite sleepy friend. and that's what i can come up with. hope the 4th was fun, i can't say we did anything wonderful. i guess we ate food and that's a tradition i hope never changes, no matter what the circumstances. wyatt held his first sparkler and tom was a little sad that we weren't there at the beginning of that adventure. maybe next year wyatt will be into roman candles.

we've been busy...friends with trouble, pops with hearts that aren't working right, kids that are adjusting to life as they know it...but in the meantime, here's a link to wyatt at his finest -- little sleep and a will to steal attention from his little sister. it's a bit lengthy but really funny. so says his momma at least.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OsblVRxM7yQ

i've been busy figuring out youtubbe and loading some videos of the little guy there. check them out if you have time. but here are some still photos of the family:

high heels really aren't a good look with plaid shorts.
cowboy boots are a little better.but red chuck taylors and camo, now that's a look i can go for.
cassie is figuring her way around the exersaucer.
wyatt refuses to sit in his highchair anymore, so he's moved to the big table in the booster seat. he's also very good about using a coaster for his drink.

cassidy is the happiest victim of a stick-up.

wyatt talks seriously about the fundamentals of soccer: balls.

my parents will celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary this year, and in light of this fact, our four year anniversary doesn't seem so monumental. but to us, it's pretty fun. we've been through a lot in that amount of time, most of it really wonderful, some of it sort of hard. i think you'll find that we still have those big smiles on our faces most of the time. i may roll my eyes a little more than i used to and tom probably steals more kisses than he'd like, but we're excited about where God is taking us. we both have different hairstyles now and i can't quite fit into that dress anymore, but i still like to hold his hand and i love the old timer/cowboy that sits at my supper table every night. i thought i was marrying a teacher, started out with an insurance salesman, spent some time with a painter and now i have a combination of painter/mentor/ministryman/teacher/comedian/ insuranceguide/handyman/papa/sweetheart. he's a rennaisance man of sorts, but i like to call him boo.

(give the bangs some time, honey, you might like them)

i know i'm a little delayed, but it seems that he was too...after 15 days of thinking he was coming and then six days of real contractions and then 27-- TWENTY SEVEN -- hours of labor, noah caleb blake debuted. may 31st (just three days beyond sharing it with his own auntie across the street, so close) was quite a day for lauren and paul and harrison. he's a cutie and quite skinny, but that shouldn't come as much of a surprise, he's a blake. his story is great: from lauren's endurance with gestational diabetes, to noah being breach and then turning, to her constant yet inconsistent contractions, then the possibility of noah having really large shoulders and lauren maybe having a c-section, wow! thanks to many MANY prayers lauren's diabetes didn't cause her to have any serious complications(noah doesn't have diabetes and lauren's went away once she gave birth, hence the "gestational" part), noah turned on his, his shoulders weren't too big and lauren gave birth (almost) exactly how she wanted. i got to see her a little before she started pushing (about 24 hours into the labor part) and she looked wonderful. after the epidural and a very short nap her countenance was lifted and she seemed ready to tackle the world. which she kind of did. all this to say: believe that the creator of the universe has you in his hands if you just let him pick you up. lauren never doubted the Lord's will for her and noah and knew that things would be fine and she stood on that. and here he is. he's remarkably cute for so little, especially considering this one picture was taken while they were still in the hospital. so praise the Lord, he does great things.
also, do you see this woman? she has 4 kids (3 of them boys!) and 7 grandchildren. she is amazing and beautiful. she's wyatt and cassidy's mima and she's fabulous. hubba hubba.

gnocchidding

i made gnocchi tonight according the "gnocchi I" recipe from allrecipes.com and then combined it in a gnocchi bake, a la susan simon. (she might have gotten this recipe from allrecipes.com as well). round out the meal with some garlic and parmesan biscuits and YUM! it was so good. i encourage anyone who hasn't already, try gnocchi. and make it. it was so easy. i added a little garlic salt to my batter and it was just enough to make it fantastic. i have to say i have never had real italian gnocchi so i'm not sure what it's supposed to taste like but tom loved it when susan made it (he said it reminded him of the gnocchi he had in italy) and he loved it tonight. not much leftover for wyatt but i'm sure tom will fight him for it.

sidenote: allrecipes.com is wonderful. check it out if you haven't. the reviews make all the difference.

is it really strange that as i lie here in bed (lie? lay?) i'm looking forward to using my new stand mixer, courtesy of cuisinart? i used it yesterday to make foccacia and it was thrilling. i just threw things in and it spun around. powerfully i might add. i didn't go for the retro-style kitchenaid mixer. i opted for the more powerful, slightly larger bowl, sewing machine-looking cuisinart. i'm pleased, to say the least. what do i plan on making with my mixer? challah bread, for sure.

my sister-in-law introduced me to challah (pronounced with so much phlegm you'll need a hanky) a little while ago when she dropped off a slice on a friday afternoon. she informed me that every friday we're supposed to have challah, because it's shabbat. and this is where things in my head begin to spin.

last summer i was reading through the first few books of the old testament. when i came upon the ten commandments i was so confused. there in exodus 20 he tells us "Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the LORD your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your manservant or maidservant, nor your animals, nor the alien within your gates. For in six days the LORD made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but he rested on the seventh day. Therefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy."

okay, so i assume that he's talking about me keeping the sabbath holy for him. and i follow all the other commandments as best i can (with a lot of grace) but what does keeping the sabbath holy even mean? did i miss this sunday school lesson when i pretended i was sick and lamented the fact that i wouldn't get to eat arby's for lunch OR play with my friends? i don't think that's the case (although i wish it were).

here are the problems: when is the sabbath? is it on sunday or saturday? does it start in the morning or the evening? what qualifies as work? and how do i keep it holy? is it possible for me to not work one day each week when i'm a wife and mother? i'm trying to wrap my life around this concept, to remember this will make the rest of my week feel different. and i'm trying to not be legalistic about the whole thing, because while some may say cooking is work, it's usually a joy to me. especially if i'm using my stand mixer. and i can't let a dirty diaper go unchanged for 24 hours, so maybe that won't count as "work" but easing my children's burdens.

all in all, though, i like this commandment. i want to obey it. my whole life the term "sabbath" didn't mean anything except sunday morning service, but it's supposed to remind me of the beginning of life. it's hard work, i imagine, making something out of nothing. but i wonder if he really did take a break, what with adam and eve running around down there...

'65 mustang

i am a free woman. officially. last night i drove out to the middle of nowhere, narrow-laned country and then home again. in the dark. during a massive rainstorm. on skinny roads, on highway, on shawnee mission parkway with the stop and go of traffic lights every ten seconds. in the 4-runner. and i never killed it. and cassidy slept the whole way home. hallelujah. now i really feel like i can go anywhere. i thought i was victorious after going to sam's and whole foods the other day, but this proves i can drive a stick. it seems silly to all of you manual drivers. laugh if you will. i've been learning to drive stick since i turned sixteen. that's twelve years, people.

first it was my dad trying to teach me in his 5-speed bmw in the high school parking lot. i couldn't do it because i was "hormonal." we still laugh about that one.

then brad lewis tried to teach me because we were travelling to seattle in his subaru and i didn't know how to drive it. i made it around the block but when we got on the real road i defaulted to him and stephanie and the other brad for driving. i slept and sang a lot. and really, i'm surprised i never wanted stephanie to teach me to drive. she was a pro. she had the boys beat on "power shifting." that girl can do anything. except grow her hair longer than mine -- never!

and tom tried to teach me after we sold the corolla and before he went to guatamala so i wouldn't be homebound. so eight months later, with a little help from my pops (full circle i guess) i'm on the road again. and if you hear a loud rumble it might be me, shifting from fifth to second. come to find out that's not recommended but it's all a little blurry in the rain.

more like wyatt looks like a kewpie doll, even without the photoshopping.

our friend cassie thinks tom might look a little bit like a kewpie doll. what do you think? (who else remembers kewpie dolls?)

what have i been doing? reading other people's blogs. it's so fun to have links to other interesting and artisitic stuff.
oh, and playing with wyatt. we pulled out the lincoln logs the other day. they're real wood. i want to put the whole set together, but he's not really into building. more breaking. so i had to hold my breath and count to ten when he destroyed the awesome tower i built over the train tracks, or when he tried to put the cowboy inside the bank and wrecked that too. maybe i'll build it while he's sleeping...

if you're looking for a really good blog, present company excluded, visit this one. this is my former co-worker, still good friend, and if she doesn't make you laugh out loud you don't have a funny bone. also, if you need a little touch up work done, she's the master. she taught me everything i know. (and i'm not talking about liposuction or breast aumentation)

$o.o1

the price of stamps went up again. i think the last time this happened was when tom and i got married. we sent out all these thank-yous but had to have the extra one cent stamp to add to the already purchased stamps. so now they're offering the forever stamp. you buy it for 41 cents and it will always be good, even when the postal service raises the prices again (and they will.) i listened to 'wad'ya know' on npr saturday and michael feldman said if it really is a "forever" stamp then you should be able to reuse it too. so if someone sends you a letter you should cut it out and either give it back to them or use it the next time you send a letter. i like this idea, except for the fact that we hardly ever get any mail with real stamps and right now i'm sending out baby announcements (yes she is already three months old, but in the grand scheme that's not that old). so it's off to the post office to get some one cent stamps, and maybe some forever stamps. check a mailbox near you. i dare you to reuse it.

sidenote: do you call him the postman or the mailman? (and no jokes about calling him "dad")

so i changed the background (again) because i forgot i left it on that white and ick, that's not very appealing, is it? but check out this header. is that a grape? olive? some type of leaf that has food attached to it? surely they're associated with food...maybe i should change the name of the blog to foodfoodfoodilovefoodilovetoeat.blogspot.com

you're wondering where i've been. did you look for me in the kitchen? it's been a rough two weeks and there's one more to go. and i will be honest, dear reader, i've fallen off the wagon. a week ago i realized i had become a maniac and decided to save my husband and children and start eating what america eats. cheese. and bread. and sometimes fruit with my meat. and it tastes good. it was gradual, this easing out of the cleanse, like i had my back to the door and while graciously bowing, i scooted out.

tom meanwhile still endures the cleanse, eating strictly according to the schedule and menu. that menu is created by me and is one of the reasons why i was crazy. grilling lunch, grilling dinner. chopping peppers for lunch. chopping onions for dinner. peeling and slicing carrots for a snack. going to the grocery store every three days. closing my eyes as the long-haired cashier at whole foods tells me the total. thanking the lord that sam's club offers organic salad in bulk. and in a container made of corn.

was cooking really what drove me to madness? no, not just the time in the kitchen, or the heat of the grill on muggy days. it was the money. and the lack of variety. and the fact that if we were in a time crunch, we really couldn't go out to eat, and certainly not fast food. how does a family function if mom is a wreck?

i'm not too proud to tell you that a lack of will and discipline was involved. i can omit sugar for a time. i can omit cheese for a time. i can omit carbs (nevermind they're sugar too) for a time. i can even omit sauces. but all these things at the same time? and then limiting my protein portions (don't worry, i upped it for the baby's sake). being allowed to eat as many veggies as i want doesn't really make up for all the other stuff.

surely i learned something from my week of "cleansing".

things i learned while not eating whatever i want whenever i want, by leah blake
1) i like food
a) i like to cook food
b) i like to eat food
c) i like to give food as a gift

2) i am not a scheduled person
a) breakfast, lunch and dinner always come first for wyatt
b)breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, second lunch, dinner and second dinner for cassidy always take priority over my stomach
c) tom gets to eat when i eat, unless it involves granola or eggs

3) beets are not scary
a) i know where the term "beet red" comes from
b) you can grill beets or bake beets and they're good
c) they're kind of like potatoes
d) if i were into textiles i'd use them a lot to dye things

4) i do not like lamb, sam i amb

a) not ground

b) not leg

5) larabars are amazing
a) fruit and nuts, what's not to love?
b) soy free, gluten free, dairy free, no gmo, no added sugar, unprocessed, raw, and kosher
c) you can buy them at sam's for less than $1.oo

6) eggs are better with cheese and butter
a) tom likes them with a side of potatoes
b) i like them with a side of toast
c) we both like them with a side of bacon

7) the grill is my friend
a) not much clean up
b) fast cooking
c) you can put anything on it

in short (don't you love it when people say that at the end of a long monologue?) i'm not on the cleanse any more and i'm really excited for tom and the other 7 people who are on it to be finished so we can eat cinnamon rolls and drink coffee. yum.

this is so sad but i just saw a really well-taken photograph of someone wearing a jean jacket with a hoodie underneath and jeans and i thought, i wish it were cool outside. didn't we just leave winter?

day three

all part of a complete breakfast. it's really hard when you wake up saturday morning and all you want to do is scramble some eggs, fry some bacon and drown your pancakes in sweet, sweet syrup and then you remember, i get to drink a shake this morning. 18 days left and i'm hungry. really the shakes aren't too bad. you add a supplement powder and a fiber powder and some oil to water and frozen fruit and you've got yourself some kind of smoothie. it's nothing to complain about. it's quite filling and once you add pineapple to anything it tastes nice. it's the lack of real food in the morning. no spoon, no fork. oh i forgot to mention but definitel no coffee. i repeat: NO COFFEE. we've got some broadway coffee sitting on the shelf, as well as some allegro coffee from whole foods, both birthday presents for tom. the timing was off a little bit on his 30th, that's for sure. now when i open the cupboard for a glass to pour my shake into i get a waft of luna in whole bean form. what am i learning from all of this? i miss cooking. i miss that complete meal with the right beverage and side and dessert. oh dessert. not that we aren't eating. just not very much. more on that later. (they say your energy increases on this thing but i have yet to enjoy that benefit.) with heavy eyes i'll dream of cinnamon rolls and black coffee...i shouldn't even joke like that.

day one

7 pills + 3 times a day = 21 stinky pills
they'll clean you out one way or the other

for unka jo

we serve up cute little burritos and tons of tortilla chips, so come on over... take that christiano ronaldo...this is what cute looks like with its shirt off...
so then the fish said to the seahorse...

the day i forgot

i'm in the midst of it, so i'm not going to forget it. yet. while wyatt is on the accelorated track for cuteness, his words are slow in understanding. he'll talk for hours but only he knows what he's saying. today he reached into the suitcase of toys and said "BALL" and lo-and-behold he pulled out the soccer ball! huzzah!

he says "atchoo" when i sneeze; in a semi-reckognizable way he says "what's this"; and is starting to say "sis" i guess. i think he might be saying "Jesus" a lot, so maybe he's already learning how to talk with the messiah. nice. but today was remarkable because he said it on his own and then produced the ball.

woodpecker
we have a beak-challenged woodpecker banging on our sun porch. it's not wood. at all. there are no termites living inside. it makes a very loud noise when he bangs on it and i think he'll eventually suffer a bent beak if he doesn't stop.

joe
he sent me pictures of his czech girlfriend, iva, and she's a looker. those darn skinny europeans.

food
the cleanse starts tomorrow. that means we're eating uber-healthy. no carbs, no fun. i won't be baking for 21 days. we'll see what that does with my free time.

stay tuned for some bathtub photos. if i can figure out video on this blog there may be some of that, too.

i promise

we're alive here, and kicking for that matter. just a little under the weather and recovering from the pre-birthday, birthday and post-birthday gatherings. yup, he's thirty. 30. three-zero.

oh, and the wizards won their first game, on the road at rfk. kc-4, dc-2. our new pick-up michael harrington showed us he's a starter and good ol' sasha showed us he's still got it.

my competition

happy 60th birthday emmylou (i know there are prettier pictures of emmylou, but this one is with a dog and who doesn't love dogs as much as their favorite country singer?)

a-1 trash man

it amazes me how fast wyatt's moods change. this morning started off rocky and i offered to trade places with tom. he's spraying a house today and thankfully he didn't take me up on my offer. an hour after wyatt's crabby breakfast episode the trash man comes and wyatt is enthralled. he crouches down to look out the window as the a-1 guy throws the bags into the truck. when the lever lifts the trash can, well that's the icing on the cake. and then usually there's a cute wave from the trash guy and wyatt just stares. maybe he's thinking, one day i want to do that...maybe he's thinking, thank you for taking my stinky diapers. whatever he's thinking, he looks darn cute while doing it.

k-who?

wyatt just barely fit into this get-up for the tournament, but it really doesn't matter, does it?

uncle joe

this is wyatt on the tail-end of being sick. i'd like to think that he was crabby because of said sickness, however, i think it has more to do with the fact that he does not remember the last time he saw joe (he was only 9 months, i think). he thought joe was hilarious, but only at a distance. when joe got his paws on wyatt i thought the world was going to fall apart...maybe next time wyatt will be more polite when his uncle comes to the states.

i almost forgot...

wyatt puked on brooks' foot, too. that makes everyone a victim of the vomit, except yuma. lucky dog.

in the last five days i've:

had both babies poop on me in the same day
watched wyatt projectile vomit while sitting on tom's lap
bathed wyatt at least 6 times in one day
washed wyatt's sheets a dozen times
reswaddled cassidy in the middle of the night more times than i care to count
gagged because of my son's poop
thrown up myself
rinsed some form of excrement out of every member of our family's clothes (except yuma's?)
listened to wyatt cry more than i thought was possible
watched wyatt eat a banana while dancing while sitting on tom's lap
let wyatt watch television (9pm and nacho libre was on...harmless, right?)
slept and not slept
asked for God's mercy multiple times every day

having sick babies is the pits.

look at the size of that mellon

um, where is cassidy, luke?

who are these people and why do they look like they're going to eat my daughter???

cassidy faith

PROUDEST PAPA IN TOWN
(the big cheeser)

she came at last, with a little help from the doctor and a lot of help from gravity. we went in around 7:30am after the beautiful snow fall and got things rolling. at first i was concerned we'd have another wyatt delivery because no sooner had the contractions started then the nurses ran in and made me roll to my side. ugh, those little heartbeats are so sensitive. it turns out she just wanted me to lay on my side and not my back. i moved from the rocker to standing to laying over the back of the bed. and that's when it happened. i went from a 3 at 9am, a 6 at 10:10am and the little girl (although at the time she didn't seem little at all) was born at 10:38am. seven pounds, barely seven ounces, crying and messy and a girl. i wouldn't recommend delivering that fast, and come to find out the doctor doesn't recommend it either, but there's no stopping it. THE T.BLAKE FAMILY
(no, wyatt wasn't in the delivery room when his siter arrived...)

i decided that we should be finished with the childbirth thing or the next baby will be born in the kitchen. funniest part of labor: we listened to johnny cash just like we did when wyatt was born. only this time during labor i didn't want tom holding my hand or anything of that sort. in fact, when i saw him tapping his foot to the music or singing along i shot him such a look of madness that he stopped cold in his tracks. i wasn't a very gracious laborer, i'll admit it, but i never called him names or blamed him for my pain (at least not that i remember).
we're pretty excited to be at home again with wyatt and yuma and brooks. it feels good. cassidy's a sleeping and eating champ and wyatt's got a special little smile he cracks out for his sister every now and again. he's more interested in her stuff than her, though. thanks for all your prayers and phone calls and meals. we really love seeing you guys and want you to be a part of cassidy's life. here's a little show of our new baby if you have a minute and want to do something other than work -- http://sorellimages.com/cassidy (the link thing wasn't working so i hope this works instead. it's a great site to check out anyway)
OH MY GOSH!!! SHE"S PURPLE!!!
(i'm just stoked she's out)

here's one for the scrapbook, eh? i think i'm screaming about how little she is, or that she really is a girl. when you know what you're having they don't think to verify or reassure you that she really is a SHE. but she is. and no, she's not purple anymore.

i can't believe i'm less than a week away from giving birth and i have cold. are you serious? as if sleeping at night were possible in the first place, now i have to fight nausea AND sneezing, coughing and peeing every ten minutes. sorry to complain, people, but this is why people say the last month of pregnancy is the hardest. and at this point, i agree. if cassidy is 40 lbs i don't care, just get her out. please. and heal my sore nose while you're at it.

and counting

just a quick little update...no, my water didn't break, yet. we did set a date, though, in case she needs a little prodding. assuming that she isn't as adventurous and eager as her older brother, she will be arriving sometime february 13th. i don't think she'll take her sweet time once she's been summoned and i predict a birthday of the 13th; who cares if she's a "valentine's baby" or not, as long as she's out! so any time you feel like praying for a healthy and easy delivery, go for it. i'mlooking forward to it, the delivery, and i'm not worried. i checked out shawnee mission on monday and they seem just as nice as menorah, except that kelley won't be there to take care of me. but this should be old hat, right?
anyway, i'll keep you updated and let you know if her birthdate changes.

1.26.2007

happy birthday paul newman. or paulito newmano. or p. brigando newman. whatever your name is, you look darn good for 82.

in case you weren't aware of my extreme liking of paul newman, here's a little catch up on why this man is great...

one- he's been in some of the best movies ever made (thanks to steph and brad for being watchers of great movies): cool hand luke, butch CASSIDY and the sundance kid, the long hot summer (william faulkner short story), the hustler, hud, the sting, the drowning pool (with his wife joanne woodward, blessed woman), the color of money, and the hudsucker proxy (the coen brothers).

two- if you haven't tried "newman's own" you're missing out on great food, some totally organic (like the chocolate chip cookies which makes them good for you). and also the chance to help paul's charity, the hole in the wall camps (get it?), expense-free camps for kids with life-threatening illnesses and conditions. they've raised $175 million dollars for charity in the last 20 years; all of the money they make on newman's own, after taxes, goes to charities like the hole in the wall camp.

three- he's got gorgeous eyes. blue eyes that dabble just a little bit in the green realm. he also has an odd nose, a little hooked at the bottom. almost beak-like some might say. not me. perfect. (which really reminds me of a man who is even dearer to me... who will be 52 years younger than mr. newman on 4.11.2007)

four- he tells terribly corny jokes. like this one: (in reference to newman's own steak sauce) preferred by 9 out of 10 cows. we steak our reputation on it. (again, this reminds me of someone i love who tells jokes so bad that i wouldn't be surprised if he tried to add this to his own arsenal)

also, who else would let people see an image like this except someone totally confident and wonderful, and a little humble, although still very sexy. curious?

but with a mug like this, you can do anything... even eat 50 eggs (free-range, i'm sure).
happy birthday.

c'mon over

i wish i could invite everyone over during wyatt's naptime. he is so stinking cute when he's sleeping and then just getting up. i just peeked in on him and he's standing up in his crib, leaning on the edge of the rails with his pacifier in his mouth and holding onto his soft grey blanket. then, pop, he spits his pacifier out and starts to talk. wow. he's got to be the sweetest poco pollo in the world.

short attention spans

i knew you guys would go quiet on a long post. the only time people comment is on a funny or scandolous post. so here's a little (actually a lot) of skin. can you believe there's a small child in there? and she was freezing her tookus off at the time, i'm sure. i was.

funny story: my sister sarah took these pictures. when i was pregnant with wyatt we had scheduled to shoot some pregnancy picutres on friday, november 4th. well, my water broke thursday the 3rd and we never got around to the big belly pictures. i'm glad we got to take pictures this time around, but i'm ready for the girl to come out so i can tie my shoes.

may this photo warn all of you having sex...this could happen to you...lord willing.

elephant knees

we talk about the church being the bride and Christ the bridegroom a lot, in churches these days. for me it's always been kind of a floating term; how can a group of so many people represent one entity? what kind of suit does Jesus wear? and what's the point of the whole analogy anyway? i understand the general meaning behind it. tom and i used it in our wedding vows: just as Christ is head of the church so you will be head of our family (or something like that. i couldn't remember it 3 1/2 years ago, you think i'm going to be accurate now?) but finally i think i'm getting the meaning of this Christ and the church romance.

i'm reading gary wiens' book, _bridal intercession_, and he describes what this relationship looks like. i'm not very deep into it yet, but with what mike bickle says in the foreward and then the first chapter, this is what i've gathered. (i'll just quote because they say it so well). get ready to be excited about praying:

"...prayer that grows not out of our place of need, but out of God's passionate desire to commune with us as his Beloved."MB

"As we approach the last days, nothing is more important than growing in our understanding of the ways of God, so that even when we find His strategies unexpected or confusing, our hearts can be firmly established in the knowledge of His goodness and trustworthiness."MB

whether or not you believe we're living in the end times, the point is we were created to talk WITH God, not just at Him. we're not supposed to have this list of things we want to say, but to find out what He wants to say, too. it's called conversation and i've never really understood that in order to be in "relationship" i have to listen to him. to sit and be quiet, or ask questions and then wait for an answer.

so then gary wiens says, "And so He has spoken to us in various ways, with the consistent goal of engaging us in a dialogue about life in relationship with Him. this dialogue is called prayer, and its primary purpose is that we might come to know the heart of the One Who loves us and understands who we are and what we will become."

he goes on to talk about how God wants us to trust His intentions, like i trust tom's when he does things for me whether or not i can recognize it's because he loves me. He wants to be partners with us, not just this God in the sky who gave us a really fat book; somebody we use to explain things away, or question when we don't agree with what's going on in our lives or the world. it's humbling to think that, like tom says, the Almighty God, Creator of the heavens and the earth, wants to talk with me.

and then gary says, "We begin to say back to God that we agree with His agenda and His strategies, not only for ourselves and the things that concern us, but for every situation outside ourselves for which He gives us the strength to pray." i might even add "the strength and FAITH to pray". i think there's so much power in that, because sometimes, no matter how much i love you people, i don't have the energy in-and-of myself to talk with God about your needs.

i know this seems really random, but it hit me pretty hard this week. i'm looking forward to having a cup of coffee with the Almighty God, Creator of the heavens and the earth today. i'll ask Him if He wants cream and sugar, among other things...

adat yeshua

well, it's friday and time for shabbat. last semester several good friends and family spent our monday nights at this messianic jewish synagogue studying our jewish roots, our history through the jewish jesus and lots of other wildly interesting things that we just never knew. so, if you've got your mondays and/or tuesdays free and miss school and want to know more of jesus and the jews (no, john wasn't a baptist, har har, he was an immersionist) then check out adat yeshua and the jewish roots institute of kansas city.
it's not the fanciest of websites, but it's one of the coolest experiences. if little girl cassidy weren't coming so soon i'd sign up, but tom and brooks and lots of other cool people will be there. and if friday is open then come on out to a shabbat service at 7:30. rabbi feldman is a brilliant man who loves the lord and loves non-jewish people, too. what a combo. as we used to say in the 90's, "it'll rock your world."

brilliance

my sister rachel teaches pre-school to little little children. she was in town this weekend and told me a story about two kids in one of her classes. they are three years old and they're alphabatizing words, and not just the first letter but to the second and third letter. is that wonderful or what? it makes me so excited for wyatt to start talking and reading and all that stuff. my other sister sarah got him a membership to a children's book club for his birthday and i love reading him those books. with titles like "how to dinosaurs clean their rooms?" and "i love my mama" who wouldn't want to read. if only i could get him to sit still...

just because

so like everyone else in kansas we became farmers of a sort this fall and grew grass. just two months ago our lawn was dirt and now look! once the leaves got picked up, guess what i found! i'm so pleased! i prayed so much, mostly while standing outside making sure the sprinkler got all the grass and god answered by dinky little prayer for grass. i can't believe those seeds sprouted into this. ahhh...
and this little booger is cutting more teeth and is so unhappy right now, cryin and trying to sleep and just all out pouty. it makes me thankful that he has been as easy as pie for 12 months. i can take a few days of utter sadness, as long as they result in teeth (although the dr. informed me they aren't the front ones, but the side ones, so he'll be sporting the ever-popular 'i got in a fight and lost my front two teeth' look. otherwise known as vampirish.)

a gambling man

we just watched the world series of poker's final show this week and i personally was disappointed that jamie gold won. i mean, c'mon, he was the chip leader from day 4 on and then when he amassed enough chips to put anyone "all in" and he'd still be able to kick their butts, he'd get the most amazing cards. sometimes he got pocket queens when the other guy had pocket jacks. or he'd play a 5-2 (what??!!) and then get a straight! so i'm not really thrilled with this victory, plus the fact that he talked so much about what he had, he never lied, he'd show his cards and the other players still didnt' figure him out. disappointing.

and seeing that i'll never be in the world series of poker (well, slight chance anyway) it's a good thing. i told tom i was 95% sure we're having another boy. turns out i was only 5% right. yup. not so good at reading the tells of my pregnancy, i guess i just get sick whenever i'm pregnant, boy or girl. to be honest, i'm not sure i believe it 100% yet. so i'm praying the lord will help my unbelief so i can start buying skirts. pink skirts.

a gambling man

we just watched the world series of poker's final show this week and i personally was disappointed that jamie gold won. i mean, c'mon, he was the chip leader from day 4 on and then when he amassed enough chips to put anyone "all in" and he'd still be able to kick their butts, he'd get the most amazing cards. sometimes he got pocket queens when the other guy had pocket jacks. or he'd play a 5-2 (what??!!) and then get a straight! so i'm not really thrilled with this victory, plus the fact that he talked so much about what he had, he never lied, he'd show his cards and the other players still didnt' figure him out. disappointing.
and seeing that i'll never be in the world series of poker (well, slight chance anyway) it's a good thing. i told tom i was 95% sure we're having another boy. turns out i was only 5% right. yup. not so good at reading the tells of my pregnancy, i guess i just get sick whenever i'm pregnant, boy or girl. to be honest, i'm not sure i believe it 100% yet. so i'm praying the lord will help my unbelief so i can start buying skirts. pink skirts.

the switch of summer

there are a couple articles of clothing i'm mourning in this wardrobe switch. it has more to do with the growth of my belly than the change in the temperature, but nevertheless (is that one word?) i have moved my normal clothing to the basement, keeping only a few flexible pieces (thank you low- rise jeans) in the closet.
there's a patagonia skirt that would be perfect for this fall that will be folded for at least 7 months. i have a great plaid levi's shirt that is getting a little clingy for my comfort, not to mention the baby is having trouble moving. and as i went through my closet i realized there are clothes in there i never wear. how do you let go of these things? things you've had since high school. t-shirts you screenprinted yourself. tanks that fit just perfectly, if a little faded. i think, do i need this? wil i ever replace this for something better? how many black tank tops does a girl need? fortunately the vietnam vets came around with their pink bags and now i have an excuse to clean out the closet even more.

no ikea

we went to dallas this weekend and i have one word -- ikea. here's the deal: if you've never been there then you have no idea what this place is like. it is a wonderment to behold. our friends, the gales, went to minnesota a while back and asked us if we wanted them to bring anything back for us. we politely declined, not really thinking it was a necessity. we had no idea.
we went to dallas (frisco, actually) to visit jason and shannon and their quickly growing clan. tom also caught a coffee conference that proved to be helpful. really, though, the ikea rocked our world. the organization of the place is beautiful. the concept of not loading your cart till you're ready to check out is brilliant. the price, too hard to turn down. so really, what i'm saying is, i'm thankful we don't have an ikea anywhere close to us, otherwise my house would be more organized than a library and we would be starving. and i would have tom to blame.

honey this is very good

while washing the dishes the other day i was overwhelmed by God's idea of babies. how did he come up with babies? he created adam, fully grown and eve, out of a rib, but babies are a totally different story. they grow. they crawl. they stand. they laugh. they eat. they smile. that's the most amazing thing in the world.

when wyatt wakes up he's usually standing at the corner of the crib, holding on and trying to chew on the railing. when he sees me he moves away a little bit and smiles. oh. he's so glad i'm coming in to get him up for the new day. i pick him up, his diaper soggy and his precious skin so soft. and he keeps smiling until i lay him down to change that diaper...and then he thinks it's time to go back to bed. i reassure him and change his diaper and we begin the adventure of life that changed everything i ever knew to be true about life. nothing is the same.

the inevitable

this is why you don't work when you have children: inevitably when you leave them with their grandparents for a couple of hours they do something they've never done before, like smash their face against the mesh of the pack-n-play until they've pushed their way to the top and are standing up. wow. i'm so proud of the little bug, i just wish he'd learn to sit down on his own now.